08-29-2025

Third Time the Charm?

Hello Everyone!

As of yesterday afternoon Nikki flew to Denver to begin round three. We actually started stimming a few days ago, but today was her first monitoring appointment! The ultrasound showed 11 follicles developing on one side and 15 on the other. Her uterine lining was 5mm, which is a potential good sign for being able to do a fresh embryo transfer a few days after the egg retrieval. Honestly, we’re feeling upbeat and hopeful this time around and the first appointment looks good!

Right now she is staying in a friend’s house who is away, still working remotely and managing all the details of life. She’s probably not big on responding to texts but any words of encouragement, cat memes or pet pictures would brighten her day.

Dane is still in PDX until the fourth, holding down the fort and working.

Love you all!!! Thank you SO much for everything!!!

08-19-2025

Heading Into Round 3

Hello Everyone!

Our apologies to all of you for our issue with the last update. Gift of Parenthood had some technical difficulties and it was deleted by accident. However, since then, there have been more developments and information and so this update will have more information than the last.

Nikki and I completed our second egg retrieval at the very end of May. Sixteen Eggs were retrieved, 14 were mature and 11 fertilized. Of those 11, only 4 made it to the blastocyst stage; meaning they would be sampled and submitted for genetic testing. While this number was smaller than last time, this wasn’t totally unexpected as part of the change to the IVF medication regimen was designed to have fewer eggs but hopefully eggs of higher quality. Once again we waited for the results to come through. That wait is so long, and so nerve wracking.

During this wait, on June 16th, Nikki had her third surgery for Asherman’s and we received the good news that her uterus is cleared of the scar tissue from the lost pregnancy over a year ago. If we can get a healthy embryo, we should be able to have a natural pregnancy with a healthy baby.

Unfortunately, when the results came back, it once again showed that all of the embryos were abnormal in some way. None of them were going to be healthy enough to implant. We were back at square one. It is difficult to describe the level of disappointment, sadness and frustration. After all of our diet changes and supplements, the lifestyle changes, the emotional labor and money, we were back at square one. Again. We honestly wrestled with what to do next. In some ways we feel like Prometheus, chained to our stone, fruitlessly eviscerating ourselves with no change in outcome.

At the end of June, we had a dear friend come to us and offer us a very kind donation to help us keep going. There were several other people who also contributed very meaningful amounts. She told us that she is willing to invest in us and it was just the boost of faith and hope that helped us decide that we’re going to go for one more round. We’re staying on the diet and lifestyle changes (minus a week of indulgent sulking) and looking to our next cycle.

Currently, we are planning to start stimming in the last week of August. Nikki is set to fly out to Denver again on 08/28 and Dane is set to follow on 09/04. The doctor we worked with has made a few medication adjustments. This time we’re going to try one other thing we haven’t tried yet. After the egg retrieval, we will start the progesterone medications to prepare Nikki for a fresh embryo transfer. Without testing, and without freezing, the plan is to place two embryos somewhere between the 8th and 10th of September. There are still a number of factors that will impact whether or not we will be able to do the procedure, the most impactful is how well Nikki is recovering from the egg retrieval.

In truth, it feels we’re bracing for the possibility that this next round will be much of the same. And yet, we persist and we hope and we believe in the dream. Part of the beautiful sorrow that comes with this is realizing how strong we are as a couple and how grateful we both are to be in this relationship. There is something about pouring your heart into a dream together, that, even if it doesn’t come to fruition, you know that you gave it everything you could. We have grown in our depth of connection, our gratitude and the assurance of what an amazing life we have. Please, keep us in your thoughts and prayers. Perhaps, there is still a miracle in store for us. We could have not been on this journey without all your love and support. This is the community we want to raise a child with. Thank you for making it still a possibility for us.

With each additional round there additional costs beyond the IVF clinics cost, from medication, lab work, acupuncture and laser therapy, flights, rental car, supplements, and the biggest genetic testing. Our community’s continuous support has allowed us to keep going and give this us our best shot! We are amazed by everyone that has shown up not only financially, but emotionally and spiritually too. Every bit helps.

Keep your figures crossed and we hope to share the miracle news in the next month or two.